Easy
by BlueSuedeShoes
Summary: for g3eh: Oliver and Chloe have an unsuccessful foray into cooking. Fluff warning.


**Author's Comment: Total, utter, shameless fluff. Such fun. Prompt from ****g3eh:**

" '**Burnt Mac & Cheese.' I know it might not be the best prompt in the world but it would be really interesting to read something about Chloe or Oliver attempting to make Mac & Cheese (one of the EASIEST foods to cook in the world) only to burn it."**

**Thanks for the suggestion!**

**BlueSuedeShoes**

"I'm hungry."

Chloe snorted.

"What?"

"You're _always_ hungry."

"You must be confusing me with Bart."

"No. Bart is always _ridiculously_ hungry. You are always hungry at exactly the moment we are settled in for something--in this case a movie I have been dying to see--which you then have to interrupt to get something to eat." She looked at him from her very comfortable position on the couch, snuggled into his lap.

"That is not true."

She quirked an eyebrow.

"Mostly."

She laughed. "Well I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but the last time I checked, you gave the staff the night off, and neither of us is any use at cooking."

He pushed her off his lap and she rolled onto the couch with a defeated sigh. "We'll find something easy then," he said confidently. "The movie will be here when we get back."

"Can I persuade you to just have some potato chips?" she called after him as he left for the kitchen.

"Nope," he hollered back from down the hall. She laughed helplessly before getting up to go after him.

When she found him in the kitchen, going through the pantry happily. He looked up when he heard her enter. "How do you feel about Macaroni and Cheese?" he asked.

"Like it's more trouble than it's worth?" she suggested. Oliver ignored her.

"I think it sounds good," he said, throwing her a box of assorted pasta shapes and popping his head in the fridge to find cheddar. "Anyway, it's quite possibly the easiest thing to make in the world. You can't screw up Mac'n'cheese if you _try_."

"Don't you have the instant kind that comes from a nice, convenient package?" she asked wearily.

"The powdered stuff? Nah, homemade's better, anyway."

"Do you even know how to boil water?" she teased, pulling out a pot.

He shot her an indignant look and she giggled, filling the pot with water and setting it on the stovetop.

"Find me some olive oil, would you?" she asked him as he dropped a block of cheddar on the counter.

"What for?" he asked.

"Martha Kent trick. Keeps the pasta from sticking together."

He grinned at her. "And you said you were no use at cooking."

"I am. Mrs. Kent is the one who knows what she's doing." She sought out salt as she waited for the water to boil.

Eventually the pasta was boiling away, and Oliver's hands were moving south. "Would you cut that out?" she asked, fighting back a shudder as he nuzzled her neck.

"What? You're really sexy when you get all focused like this," he teased.

Chloe rolled her eyes. "I thought you were hungry."

"It's called multi-tasking."

"Here," she said, attempting to distract him. "Tell me if the pasta's soft enough." She offered up a piece of pasta on the wooden spoon to him. "Careful, it's--"

He choked on the pasta before she could finish, swallowing quickly after burning his tongue. He glared at her.

"--hot," she finished, giggling at his expression.

"It's done," he said sourly.

Grinning she went to drain the water from the pan before pouring the pasta into a glass pan. Oliver watched as she brought over the cheddar he'd grated and careful sifted it onto the pasta, making sure there was more than enough covering the pasta.

"Here," she said, handing it to him. "Stick that in the oven."

He obeyed pleasantly enough, happy that he was getting his way. "Do I need to set a timer?" he asked after closing the oven.

"No, we just need to watch it until the cheese melts," she informed him.

"Great," he said, and Chloe missed the look of mischief on his face as she washed her hands. Something hit her in the back of the head and she felt several cold, squishy _somethings_ tumble down her shirt. Crying out in shock she reached back and tugged at her shirt to get the stuff out. "What was that?" she demanded, rounding on Oliver, who was holding more cheese in his hand, smirking.

"That was for the hot pasta," he said.

"You dork," she said, to which he threw still more of the leftover cheese at her. "Oliver!" she exclaimed before turning to the faucet and pulling the hose to squirt him in the face.

Oliver sputtered, spraying her in return, and Chloe realized she'd made a grave mistake. "Oh no," she said, seeing the look on his face, "don't you--DAAAAARE!" she squealed the last word as he chased her around the island in the middle of the kitchen, nearly catching her at one point. Laughing mirthfully, she grabbed a handful of cheese to throw at him. He ducked in time and lunged across the counter at her, just missing her. He rolled off the counter just in time to grab her, wrapping his arms around her tightly and pinning her arms to her sides. Chloe shrieked with laughter as he lifted her from the floor, hugging her to him. She struggled half-heartedly against him as he kissed her neck. "Let go, you neanderthal," she insisted, but he poked her in the sides in response, causing laughter to bubble forth from her lips.

"Oh get over it. You asked for it," he told her, turning her in his arms to kiss her properly.

"Mmm...maybe," she conceded as her hands fisted in his shirt, arcing against him as his kiss forced her back.

Before she knew what had happened, she was on the floor, Oliver pressing down on her as his tongue slid past her lips. Her fingers scored through his hair, and she bucked her hips, teasing him.

He growled. "Woman, I suggest you cut that out, or you're _never_ going to get to watch that movie you've been so set on watching."

"Don't call me Woman," she threw back, "and maybe I changed my mind about the movie."

"Fine by me," he smirked, lowering his head to kiss her again.

Just as things were getting even more heated, however, they were thrown out of euphoria by an annoying beeping sound.

"I thought you didn't set a timer," Chloe muttered, thinking it had only been five or ten minutes--which technically _was_ more than enough time for the pasta.

"I didn't."

"Then wh--" Chloe's eyes opened and she looked up to see smoke billowing along the ceiling. "OH MY GOD!" she shrieked, throwing him off of her. Rushing over to the oven, she grabbed the fire extinguisher, wrenched open the oven and aimed the extinguisher at it, putting out the flames. She stared at the blackened pasta in shock, then reached to turn off the dials, realizing she should have done that first. Then her hand paused in mid-air. She grabbed an oven mit and threw it at Oliver, who was busy turning the fire alarm off.

"What was that for?" he asked in surprise.

"YOU PUT IT ON BROIL? WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?" she shouted at him incredulously.

"What?" he shrugged, confused.

"You were supposed to set it to bake, not broil! No wonder it went up in flames!" She shook her head in exasperation.

"Sorry?" he said foolishly, getting down from the chair he was standing on.

She turned the oven off finally, amazed at his thickness. "You're hopeless."

"I'm not hopeless. I'm amazing."

"How's that?" she asked, trying to suppress laughter as he walked over to kiss her.

"I'm amazing because I'm so persistent," he said against her lips.

"Oh?"

"Yeah. I'm going to try the whole thing over again. I'm thinking we should add whipped cream to the food fight this time, though," he suggested, wiggling his eyebrows up and down at her.

Chloe groaned. "You're lucky I love you."

He shrugged. "I know. And you're lucky I'm so amazing."

"Are you sure we can't just order a pizza?" she asked hopefully.

He smirked at her. "That would be too easy."


End file.
